Nine Double Oh Penis

I was re-watching The Sweetest Thing last night and I almost cried laughing. I remember going to see this movie in the theatre with my friend Gena. Neither of us expected it to be as funny as it was, and we were both hoping to maybe mock it a little bit.

I remember watching this scene in particular with my jaw basically touching the ground:

Now I watch it and I’m like: Dude. Are romance heroines unreliable narrators? Maybe they’ve all been watching this scene on repeat and think that this is the way to talk to men. “Your penis! Is so! LARGE!”

I’m getting to the point that whenever I read about how big some guy’s dick is I roll my eyes. And no matter how tight the heroine is, she can take it all, no lube or warming up required. And no matter how much peen she takes on a daily basis she is still snug as a bug in a rug.

Now I’ll be thinking about this scene. Every time I read about some guy’s GINORMOUS WANG I am going to treat the narrator as unreliable.


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